This line made me so nostalgic. "What if I pretended like it was 1993 and sat on the porch listening to the wind or watching the rain?" I miss that simplicity. I feel lucky to be Gen X, and you've captured why.
This is the dilemma I have right now as well. I want *real* connection. But I barely know anyone in real life who also does. I only ever get to speak face to face with my wife on her days off, and my therapist once per week. My health and mobility mean that my only way to find meaningful connections is online, but the joke is that very little online is actually real. And it's gets harder and harder to tell the difference every day.
Thanks for sharing this. I've missed ypur presence here, but I'm so glad to hear that you're choosing real life over...this.
I think there are real connections to be made, but you have to find the people sharing their true fucked up selves without an agenda. Those are the diamonds in the rough.
Eloquently said. I'm an older Millennial, so I remember a time without the internet as well. I also remember a time when the internet was just ... better. I remember when going online was something you had to actively, consciously do. I remember when it didn't feel like the entire internet was trying to sell me something. I remember when "logging off" was both normal and expected. Totally understand why you're unplugging.
I just can't help thinking our collective attention problems are caused by our lifestyle. I think ADHD is real and it's a spectrum, but I also think we constantly misdiagnose ourselves with it to try and figure out what's wrong with us. Maybe there's nothing wrong with us, but the world we live in.
I’m grateful to be in a place where I don’t need to grow a following. I don’t need “likes” to make a living. I don’t need to sell subscriptions or grow my online business. I don’t resent people who are trying to make a living selling their art or writing, but I also steer clear of anyone who seems desperate. There are so many thirsty people screaming for attention to try and sell themselves, and it feels like the antithesis of following our passions.
Thisssssssss. Such a profound piece. Thanks for sharing. I’m thinking about shutting her down for a bit too. And I already know what will happen.
I was talking w a friend about something like this a couple days ago.
With the exception of occasional phone dates w family and distant friends, 20 minutes to skim BlueSky & Substack and very few emails, I’m keeping my phone silenced. It has become easier over time. 🙏🏻
I’ve been thinking similar thoughts. I see this all as a necessary evil. I’m a creator and need the platforms to get my work out. In the process I makes some discoveries like this one of liked minded people or other interesting people but half the stuff out here is people begging for attention and that’s disappointing.
I used to have “no screen days” once or twice a week during lockdown - and it was fabulous. I actually read books. I’d do it again now, except that my phone is basically glued to my hand for work, studying, and because I live alone in a foreign country. Anyway - I’m glad to read this, and to know people are still thinking about these things.
I’ll jump on this train with you, CR. A slow moving, sight seeing train sounds damn wonderful right now.
This line made me so nostalgic. "What if I pretended like it was 1993 and sat on the porch listening to the wind or watching the rain?" I miss that simplicity. I feel lucky to be Gen X, and you've captured why.
I think we all romanticize the past because in our mind's eye it was simpler then. I think it's more true for Gen X than most.
This is the dilemma I have right now as well. I want *real* connection. But I barely know anyone in real life who also does. I only ever get to speak face to face with my wife on her days off, and my therapist once per week. My health and mobility mean that my only way to find meaningful connections is online, but the joke is that very little online is actually real. And it's gets harder and harder to tell the difference every day.
Thanks for sharing this. I've missed ypur presence here, but I'm so glad to hear that you're choosing real life over...this.
I think there are real connections to be made, but you have to find the people sharing their true fucked up selves without an agenda. Those are the diamonds in the rough.
True. Some people are so good at hiding their agendas, and I guess I'm just tired of the disappointment of finding out too late.
Me too Debs, real connection with real bodies but everyone is so busy. Why is everyone so busy?
That's the same question I keep asking myself. People used to *make* time for each other, but now they have to *find* it.
Eloquently said. I'm an older Millennial, so I remember a time without the internet as well. I also remember a time when the internet was just ... better. I remember when going online was something you had to actively, consciously do. I remember when it didn't feel like the entire internet was trying to sell me something. I remember when "logging off" was both normal and expected. Totally understand why you're unplugging.
remember when we walked down the street and didn't see anyone glued to their phones? We actually said "hello" and smiled!
Maybe a "hands free" holiday needs to be created?!
Thanks for sharing this..
Your "friends" notice. But I'm happy for you.
Can I buy a copy of this print?!
Certainly. I have a print of this one hanging in my office. We can make arrangements.
Totally love this.
I can't help but wonder if we haven't been the cause of our own ADHD symptoms.
Say more please
I just can't help thinking our collective attention problems are caused by our lifestyle. I think ADHD is real and it's a spectrum, but I also think we constantly misdiagnose ourselves with it to try and figure out what's wrong with us. Maybe there's nothing wrong with us, but the world we live in.
YES! Well said!
Doing nothing is doing something. Sit, breath, listen, feel... enjoy....
I’m grateful to be in a place where I don’t need to grow a following. I don’t need “likes” to make a living. I don’t need to sell subscriptions or grow my online business. I don’t resent people who are trying to make a living selling their art or writing, but I also steer clear of anyone who seems desperate. There are so many thirsty people screaming for attention to try and sell themselves, and it feels like the antithesis of following our passions.
Thisssssssss. Such a profound piece. Thanks for sharing. I’m thinking about shutting her down for a bit too. And I already know what will happen.
This post is great! I wonder if anyone really knows how to be bored. We seem to be programmed to need to shoo it away as if an unwanted illness.
Really like your article.
Good to hear you are well.
I was talking w a friend about something like this a couple days ago.
With the exception of occasional phone dates w family and distant friends, 20 minutes to skim BlueSky & Substack and very few emails, I’m keeping my phone silenced. It has become easier over time. 🙏🏻
I’ve been thinking similar thoughts. I see this all as a necessary evil. I’m a creator and need the platforms to get my work out. In the process I makes some discoveries like this one of liked minded people or other interesting people but half the stuff out here is people begging for attention and that’s disappointing.
I used to have “no screen days” once or twice a week during lockdown - and it was fabulous. I actually read books. I’d do it again now, except that my phone is basically glued to my hand for work, studying, and because I live alone in a foreign country. Anyway - I’m glad to read this, and to know people are still thinking about these things.
Beautiful to read. I took a vacation recently to go cloud watching
It was Bliss
I didn’t have constant phone anxiety as if it matters
Great points
Enjoy your trip, and your internet fast!